Chớ khinh thường việc ác nhỏ mà làm; đốm lửa nhỏ có thể thiêu cháy cả núi rừng làng mạc. Chớ chê bỏ việc thiện nhỏ mà không làm, như giọt nước nhỏ lâu ngày cũng làm đầy chum vại lớn.Lời Phật dạy
Những người hay khuyên dạy, ngăn người khác làm ác, được người hiền kính yêu, bị kẻ ác không thích.Kinh Pháp cú (Kệ số 77)
Nếu muốn đi nhanh, hãy đi một mình. Nếu muốn đi xa, hãy đi cùng người khác. (If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.)Ngạn ngữ Châu Phi
Của cải và sắc dục đến mà người chẳng chịu buông bỏ, cũng tỷ như lưỡi dao có dính chút mật, chẳng đủ thành bữa ăn ngon, trẻ con liếm vào phải chịu cái họa đứt lưỡi.Kinh Bốn mươi hai chương
Người ta vì ái dục sinh ra lo nghĩ; vì lo nghĩ sinh ra sợ sệt. Nếu lìa khỏi ái dục thì còn chi phải lo, còn chi phải sợ?Kinh Bốn mươi hai chương
Để chế ngự bản thân, ta sử dụng khối óc; để chế ngự người khác, hãy sử dụng trái tim. (To handle yourself, use your head; to handle others, use your heart. )Donald A. Laird
Muôn việc thiện chưa đủ, một việc ác đã quá thừa.Tủ sách Rộng Mở Tâm Hồn
Hương hoa thơm chỉ bay theo chiều gió, tiếng thơm người hiền lan tỏa khắp nơi nơi. Kinh Pháp cú (Kệ số 54)
Nếu chúng ta luôn giúp đỡ lẫn nhau, sẽ không ai còn cần đến vận may. (If we always helped one another, no one would need luck.)Sophocles
Thành công không phải là chìa khóa của hạnh phúc. Hạnh phúc là chìa khóa của thành công. Nếu bạn yêu thích công việc đang làm, bạn sẽ thành công. (Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.)Albert Schweitzer
VỀ MỤC LỤC
Quan hệ hôn nhân được khởi đầu từ tình yêu đôi lứa, điều đó không có gì
phải bàn cãi. Nhưng trong cuộc sống vợ chồng, yêu thương nhau và biết
tôn trọng lẫn nhau là hai việc hoàn toàn khác biệt. Để thực sự biết tôn
trọng lẫn nhau, bạn cần phải có một sự lưu tâm nhất định, vì thật không
may là điều đó lại thường không xảy ra một cách tự nhiên.
Biết tôn trọng lẫn nhau là một chất liệu tuyệt vời để nuôi dưỡng tình yêu mà nhiều người thường không quan tâm đến. Người xưa đã rất sâu sắc khi dùng từ “tương kính” để mô tả một quan hệ tốt giữa vợ chồng với nhau.[1] Mặc dù vậy, có rất nhiều yếu tố tâm lý thông thường khiến cho chúng ta thiếu sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau trong quan hệ vợ chồng.
Một trong các nguyên nhân thường gặp nhất là thiếu hiểu biết về sự cần thiết cũng như những lợi ích của việc biết tôn trọng lẫn nhau. Chúng ta coi thường nhau một cách hoàn toàn vô tình, chỉ vì chúng ta đã quá thân thiết với nhau. Nhưng điều này là bất lợi vì nó không có tác dụng nuôi dưỡng cho quan hệ của chúng ta ngày càng tốt đẹp hơn. Ngược lại, sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau mang lại cảm giác thoải mái và thỏa mãn cho cả đôi bên, và vì thế nó nuôi dưỡng tình yêu của chúng ta ngày càng thắm thiết hơn.
Bạn cảm thấy như thế nào khi một đề nghị nào đó của bạn bị bác bỏ mà không có sự giải thích cảm thông thỏa đáng? Tôi không nghĩ đó có thể là một cảm giác dễ chịu chút nào. Thế nhưng, trong quan hệ thường ngày giữa vợ chồng với nhau chúng ta lại rất thường làm điều đó. Bạn có thể nghĩ là điều đó không quan trọng lắm. Bạn
Biết tôn trọng lẫn nhau là một chất liệu tuyệt vời để nuôi dưỡng tình yêu mà nhiều người thường không quan tâm đến. Người xưa đã rất sâu sắc khi dùng từ “tương kính” để mô tả một quan hệ tốt giữa vợ chồng với nhau.[1] Mặc dù vậy, có rất nhiều yếu tố tâm lý thông thường khiến cho chúng ta thiếu sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau trong quan hệ vợ chồng.
Một trong các nguyên nhân thường gặp nhất là thiếu hiểu biết về sự cần thiết cũng như những lợi ích của việc biết tôn trọng lẫn nhau. Chúng ta coi thường nhau một cách hoàn toàn vô tình, chỉ vì chúng ta đã quá thân thiết với nhau. Nhưng điều này là bất lợi vì nó không có tác dụng nuôi dưỡng cho quan hệ của chúng ta ngày càng tốt đẹp hơn. Ngược lại, sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau mang lại cảm giác thoải mái và thỏa mãn cho cả đôi bên, và vì thế nó nuôi dưỡng tình yêu của chúng ta ngày càng thắm thiết hơn.
Bạn cảm thấy như thế nào khi một đề nghị nào đó của bạn bị bác bỏ mà không có sự giải thích cảm thông thỏa đáng? Tôi không nghĩ đó có thể là một cảm giác dễ chịu chút nào. Thế nhưng, trong quan hệ thường ngày giữa vợ chồng với nhau chúng ta lại rất thường làm điều đó. Bạn có thể nghĩ là điều đó không quan trọng lắm. Bạn
cũng có thể nghĩ là vì không có
thời gian, vì có quá nhiều những công việc khác đang cần giải quyết. Suy
cho cùng, đều là những công việc chung của gia đình, hẳn là anh ấy (hay
cô ấy) phải biết chứ... vân vân và vân vân... Có vô số lý do để chúng ta
làm thế, nhưng không có lý do nào có thể làm thay đổi được kết quả của
vấn đề.
Sự thiếu tôn trọng lẫn nhau được thể hiện qua rất nhiều sự việc thông thường hàng ngày mà hầu hết trong đó chúng ta đều xem là nhỏ nhặt. Cô ấy đang xem một chương trình ti-vi nào đó, và bạn cầm lấy hộp điều khiển từ xa để chuyển sang một kênh khác xem bóng đá. Chuyện nhỏ mà! Hết giờ làm việc, bạn gặp một người bạn cũ và cùng nhau đi dùng cơm nhưng không điện thoại về nhà, để cô ấy chờ cơm hơn một tiếng đồng hồ. Chuyện nhỏ mà! Nhưng ngay cả những việc đơn giản như thế cũng có thể bộc lộ cho thấy các bạn thiếu sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau. Thông thường thì chúng ta cũng không lưu tâm nhiều lắm khi những sự việc như thế diễn ra thường xuyên mỗi ngày, nhưng điều đó hoàn toàn không có nghĩa là mọi việc trôi qua mà không để lại ấn tượng gì.
Khi chúng ta bắt đầu bày tỏ sự tôn trọng đối với vợ hay chồng mình qua cách ứng xử thích hợp trong từng sự việc, chúng ta thường sẽ nhận lại được những phản ứng tích cực tương ứng. Và cứ thế, mọi việc sẽ tiếp tục diễn ra theo chiều hướng ngày càng tích cực hơn. Bạn thấy đấy, chỉ cần nhận thức đúng được vấn đề thì tất cả những gì diễn ra sau đó có vẻ như đều sẽ dễ dàng.
Việc tôn trọng lẫn nhau rõ ràng là một điều hợp
Sự thiếu tôn trọng lẫn nhau được thể hiện qua rất nhiều sự việc thông thường hàng ngày mà hầu hết trong đó chúng ta đều xem là nhỏ nhặt. Cô ấy đang xem một chương trình ti-vi nào đó, và bạn cầm lấy hộp điều khiển từ xa để chuyển sang một kênh khác xem bóng đá. Chuyện nhỏ mà! Hết giờ làm việc, bạn gặp một người bạn cũ và cùng nhau đi dùng cơm nhưng không điện thoại về nhà, để cô ấy chờ cơm hơn một tiếng đồng hồ. Chuyện nhỏ mà! Nhưng ngay cả những việc đơn giản như thế cũng có thể bộc lộ cho thấy các bạn thiếu sự tôn trọng lẫn nhau. Thông thường thì chúng ta cũng không lưu tâm nhiều lắm khi những sự việc như thế diễn ra thường xuyên mỗi ngày, nhưng điều đó hoàn toàn không có nghĩa là mọi việc trôi qua mà không để lại ấn tượng gì.
Khi chúng ta bắt đầu bày tỏ sự tôn trọng đối với vợ hay chồng mình qua cách ứng xử thích hợp trong từng sự việc, chúng ta thường sẽ nhận lại được những phản ứng tích cực tương ứng. Và cứ thế, mọi việc sẽ tiếp tục diễn ra theo chiều hướng ngày càng tích cực hơn. Bạn thấy đấy, chỉ cần nhận thức đúng được vấn đề thì tất cả những gì diễn ra sau đó có vẻ như đều sẽ dễ dàng.
Việc tôn trọng lẫn nhau rõ ràng là một điều hợp
lý và có lợi, chỉ vì
chúng ta vốn có thói quen không lưu tâm đến nó mà thôi. Nếu bạn thử một
lần suy nghĩ lại và bắt đầu mọi việc theo chiều hướng này, không bao lâu
bạn sẽ tự cảm nhận được ngay những ý nghĩa tích cực của vấn đề.
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Viên Hiếu Thành Huệ Lộc 1959 Bữu Phước Chúc Huy Minh Pháp Tự minh hung thich Diệu Âm Phúc Thành Phan Huy Triều Phạm Thiên Trương Quang Quý Johny Dinhvinh1964 Pascal Bui Vạn Phúc Giác Quý Trần Thị Huyền Chanhniem Forever NGUYỄN TRỌNG TÀI KỲ Dương Ngọc Cường Mr. Device Tri Huynh Thích Nguyên Mạnh Thích Quảng Ba T TH Tam Thien Tam Nguyễn Sĩ Long caokiem hoangquycong Lãn Tử Ton That Nguyen ngtieudao Lê Quốc Việt Du Miên Quang-Tu Vu phamthanh210 An Khang 63 zeus7777 Trương Ngọc Trân Diệu Tiến ... ...
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Viên Hiếu Thành Huệ Lộc 1959 Bữu Phước Chúc Huy Minh Pháp Tự minh hung thich Diệu Âm Phúc Thành Phan Huy Triều Phạm Thiên Trương Quang Quý Johny Dinhvinh1964 Pascal Bui Vạn Phúc Giác Quý Trần Thị Huyền Chanhniem Forever NGUYỄN TRỌNG TÀI KỲ Dương Ngọc Cường Mr. Device Tri Huynh Thích Nguyên Mạnh Thích Quảng Ba T TH Tam Thien Tam Nguyễn Sĩ Long caokiem hoangquycong Lãn Tử Ton That Nguyen ngtieudao Lê Quốc Việt Du Miên Quang-Tu Vu phamthanh210 An Khang 63 zeus7777 Trương Ngọc Trân Diệu Tiến ... ... ... ...